Activity Days: Courage To Be Kind

I currently work with the girls at church who are 7-11 years old. We meet twice a month. Usually when we meet, we have a lesson, we do a craft and we play a game. For tonight's activity I was in charge of the lesson. I was not able to share my lesson in person tonight due to our entire family being sick, so the other leaders delivered the message I prepared.

Here is my message:

Dear Girls,

I am sorry I cannot be there with you tonight, I am home sick with my family. The message I want to share with you tonight is near and dear to my heart, I hope that you may be able to feel the promptings of the Holy Ghost touch your hearts this evening as we talk about the courage to be kind.

Read John 13: 34 

“A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.”

Read Mark 12:30-31 

“And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment.

And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.”

Question: What message do these scriptures have in common?

The first great commandment is to love God. The second is to love our neighbors. Everyone is our neighbor, we are all children of God. Regardless of whether or not someone has done bad things, we are supposed to love them. If they look different from us, talk different from us, sin differently than we do or treat us unkindly, we are supposed to love them. Sometimes it is the people who are most unkind to us that are in need of the most love.

“A physician once said, ‘The best medicine for humans is love.’ Someone asked, ‘What if it doesn’t work?’ He smiled and said, ‘Increase the does.’”

I want to share a story with you about my little sister Megan. Megan was the youngest in our family and I am the oldest. Our parents both worked and we were often left to fend for ourselves. I am five years older than Megan and I was oft times her protector.

When Megan was born she was born with a birth defect. I wish I had a picture I could show you to help you understand, but I do not have very many good ones. She had a growth that came out of the top of her head and covered her left eye like an eyelid. This growth was puffy and purple in color—kind of like a bruise. Inside her head Megan had very large veins.

Megan has had about 15 surgeries to help save her life. Most of them occurred when I was in high school and she was in junior high. Megan spent months at a time in the Intensive Care Unit of a hospital in Seattle, Washington. When she was eventually discharged from the hospital, she was incredibly thin and fail, half of her head had been shaved and she no longer had a left eye. She was very self-conscious about the way she looked.

She wore hats and scarves to school so her classmates would not notice her missing hair. She often wore a patch over her eye so people would not notice she no longer had her eye. She worn long sleeves to hide the skin graft scars on her arms. And she sat in the back of the classroom in hopes that people would not notice her.

One day while she was waiting in line to have her school picture taken a boy who was a member of the church was standing near her. He said loud enough for her to hear, “Who would want a picture of someone with a face like that?”

I cannot tell you how badly that comment hurt my sister. She was crushed. She was devastated and she did not go to school for days.

In time she went back to school. One day she decided to be brave and showed one of her scars to a boy in her class. He thought it was so cool! He had the rest of the class gather round to see how cool it was. This more positive experience was a boost to my sisters self confidence. I am incredibly grateful to this young man who had the courage to be kind.

From Left To Right: Daniel, Hazel, Julie, Megan, Jimmy, Russell & Dad.

Today Megan lives in Connecticut. She was sealed in the Seattle Temple to her husband, Daniel. She has two children of her own, Hazel and Jimmy and a step daughter named Audrey. She graduated from Brigham Young University in Provo with her Bachelors. She graduated high school as Valedictorian at 16 years old. While Megan may not look like everyone else, she has a heart of gold. I am so blessed to call her my sister. And in case you were wondering, she has her drivers license and can safely drive with one eye.

Being kind may not always be the cool thing, or the easy thing. But, I can promise you that it will always be the right thing. As you go throughout your lives, please stop, look around you and seek out those who may be different from you and show them that you care. If you do this, I promise you that the Lord will bless not only their lives but your lives as well. I leave these things with you in the name of Jesus Christ amen.

When You're On A Trip & You Get That Phone Call You Don't Want To Get

Usually I look forward to Labor Day weekend. Andy typically gets a three day weekend and we try to go do something fun. This year he took an extra day off that meant a four day weekend-- lucky us!

We drove to Washington Friday night and arrived at my sister's house in the wee hours of the morning. Bubba stayed awake the entire car ride. By the time we had our stuff unloaded and everyone in bed it was about 2:00 am. It was warm in the room we slept in and Bubba cried most of the night, it was pretty miserable.

Rocking his binky.

Wide awake for our late night pit stop.

Saturday

Naturally we had a slow start to our day. Sadie and I took the boys and we walked to the local farmer's market-- it's one of my favorite ones.

In the afternoon we walked to the Puyallup Fairgrounds, it was the first weekend the fair was open. I love going to the Puyallup Fair! I have a lot of really good memories of the fair, the earliest memories stem back to about age 5.

We entered the fairgrounds and headed towards the dairy barn to look at the animals. We weren't there very long when Andy felt his phone vibrate, he pulled his phone out and was covered in messages from his brother and cousin. We knew instantly that something was wrong. (10 days before this we both had a sinking feeling that something terrible was going to happen or had happened, this was that terrible something).

Andy immediately called his brother. Shaun said, "There was an accident with Grandpa, Dad and the tractor and Grandpa's dead." Andy asked how his father was but Shaun didn't know, he said he was with the paramedics. And the phone call ended.

Andy instantly started to bawl. One of the fair employees asked if we needed a private room, Andy waved her off. He said he became a new creature for all the fair goers to see.

Thankfully my brother and his girlfriend were there and so was my sister and her fiance-- they took our boys and got them some ice cream so Andy could make another call.

We talked for a moment and decided to call one of the neighbors (Dale) to see if he knew what was going on. Dale answered the phone, Andy identified himself and he asked Dale if he had heard the news. Dale said, "Here talk to your Dad." Dale was with Andy's father at that exact moment.

The phone was passed and Andy's Dad told him what happened, this is the story:

Background: Grandpa loves to farm. He turned 80 just a few days before. Usually everyday he shows up at my in-laws house and asks what needs done that day and then he goes to work. This particular day was no exception.

There was some plowing that needed done, so Grandpa went to work plowing-- plowing was his favorite. The tractor was giving him some issues so he and my father-in-law decided to start up another tractor. This other tractor is quite large. It has duallie wheels in the front and the back and often has to be jump started.

(If you don't want to know the details, skip this section)

Grandpa and my father-in-law got to work jumping the tractor. They gave it some ether and it didn't start. They gave it another shot of ether and it started right up and was running full throttle. My father-in-law went to get into the cab to decrease the throttle and the tractor put itself into gear-- nobody knows how this happened. My father-in-law was thrown from the tractor, he remembers being straddled over one of the tires as it was rolling forward and coming to on the ground. The tractor had run Grandpa over and my father-in-law was paralyzed and wasn't able to get up and into the cab to prevent the tractor from rolling over Grandpa a second time.

Grandpa wasn't killed instantly. My father-in-law held him as he took his last breath. He felt his spirit leave his body from toe to head.

We later learned that my father-in-law was also run over. His pelvis is broken in two different places. He is lucky to be alive. 

(Resume here)

My father-in-law lost his best friend. He feels so guilty that he wasn't able to save Grandpa.

Andy said to his dad, "Dad it wasn't your fault. Grandpa wants you to know that. As soon as I heard he was gone, I felt his presence and he is okay."

That experience with his Grandpa brought a lot of peace and comfort to Andy.

I felt so bad for my husband. We tried to collect ourselves and make the most of our day at the fair. We enjoyed watching Bubba get his face painted and riding rides with him and his almost cousin, Adrian. 

Bubba & Adrian. I remember riding this same ride when I was in Kindergarten.

Andy & Bear.

That night the tears for me started flowing freely. They flowed freely for a few different reasons. The first being I loved Grandpa and now he was gone. I loved him and he showed me love in the way that I feel loved-- he was one of the few in the family who knew how to really show that he cared. The second was that I knew I needed to attend his funeral, but that also meant being in the same room as one of those people who has been emotional and verbally abusive to me for the past 10+ years and the thought of that alone terrified me. I hadn't seen this individual in the flesh in over 5 years and preferred to keep it that way. I suffer from PTSD because of them and was quite literally afraid for my life because of things they said they would do to me.

Sunday

The next day we went to church. Andy shared his testimony, I know it was hard for him to do given everything that just happened. After the meeting several angels were put in our path. Andy and I were both given Priesthood blessings. Mine was administered by the Stake President-- it was the most beautiful blessing I have ever received. Afterwards the Stake President grabbed my hand in his and just talked with me-- it brought me a lot of comfort.

Sunday afternoon I went on a short hike with my mom and Bubba. I feel close to God when I am in the mountains. Andy slept with Bear in the car. I carried Bubba all the way up Pinnacle Peak (a.k.a. Mount Peak) on my back-- that was the first time I have carried him in the pack on my back and it wasn't easy.

It was really good to get some fresh air, to move my body and to try and clear my head. Sadly, I didn't take a single picture.

I was starving by the time we reached the car. We stopped to grab some food at an old drive up diner, I felt really bad about buying food on the Sabbath (we don't typically eat our or buy anything on Sunday). The sweet waitress brought the food out to the car and said it was on the house-- a tender mercy and I started to bawl again.

That evening my parents called, they had been out to visit Andy's family. They drove three hours each way to see how everyone was doing and to see if I would actually be safe attend the funeral. They told me I needed to be there and that just brought on even more tears.

Monday

Monday we took it easy. We went to Ruston Way as a family to go for a walk-- this is one of my favorite places ever to walk. We looked at the old fire boat, we looked for crabs and made cairns. I enjoyed watching Andy stack rocks that Joel didn't think could be stacked. It was good to get out and get some fresh air. Listening to the waves lapping against the shore is calming to my soul.

That night we bought our plane tickets to attend the funeral in Utah, or so we thought. We would later learn that for some reason the transaction was never completed.

Tuesday

The next day we drove home. And upon learning that we didn't have plane tickets scrambled to re-book our flights. We ended up flying on another airline because the prices had jumped so much overnight. We also learned that if you call the airlines directly, they can offer you a bereavement discount on your flight.

I spy a cute little Bear.

One of the things we talked about quite a bit on the way home and even at the fairgrounds, was that we both felt like Grandpa now knows what we have been through in regards to the emotional and verbal abuse and that he is not disappointed with us.

Wednesday

Andy went to work Wednesday and I spent the day cleaning the laundry and running errands and trying to get our bags unpacked and repacked so we could leave the next morning.

Noack Reunion

This past week a whirlwind, it was an adventure, it was great and it was exhausting. I found out sometime ago that my family would be having its annual family reunion this year in Spokane, Washington and I really wanted to go. The last reunion I was able to attend was over ten years ago and it was in Newport, Oregon. Our family tries to hold a reunion each year and every year the location tends to change, it's kinda fun that way. Being in college, living in Utah, being poor and having to work has made it difficult for me to attend in the past-- this year though I was determined. With Andy just starting a new job I knew he wouldn't be able to go with me. As I contemplated driving 8 hours by myself each way with Bubba, I knew it wasn't something I could do so I bought myself a plane ticket.

I flew from Eugene to Portland had a short layover and then flew from Portland to Spokane. The first flight was great! I sat next to a girl attending BYU-Idaho she put in her headphones and fell asleep. Bubba sat calmly on my lap the entire flight. And I tried not to puke as we experienced a lot of turbulence.

At the Portland airport Bubba decided it was go time and made a few attempts to run away from me, it wasn't super fun trying to chase him down with our bags in hand.

The second flight I sat next to a larger man and he took up a good portion of my seat, his arm hair kept rubbing up against my arm, it was kinda gross. Bubba decided to wanted to move around a lot this flight, it was hard to keep him in my lap. The plane was really warm and the turbulence this flight made my nausea come on even stronger, thankfully I was able to keep everything down. I was incredibly grateful when this plane landed.

My cousin met me in the airport and helped me get all of our stuff (car seat, stroller and two suitcases) to the car and then drove me out to his parents house.

The next day (the day before the reunion started) I was able to spend some time with my grandparents (on my Mom's side of the family). It had been several years since I had seen them and it was good to catch up. Bubba loved playing my Grandma Sandy's birdbath and picking all of her raspberries.

Grandma & Grandpa -- Bubba didn't want his picture taken, we tried.

My cousin and I were able to swing my the Distribution Center and I exchanged some shirts for Andy and picked up a new temple dress for myself, I am so excited to wear it!

We also stopped by to visit our Nana, she is currently living in an assisted living home. It was a quick visit but I am glad we were able to see her!

The first day of the reunion we met at a pavilion at one of the church buildings, it was so good to see everyone. We had a potluck and everyone sat around visiting with each other. Not surprisingly a water fight broke out and Bubba ended up soaked, he didn't mind but I didn't have any spare clothes with me to change him into so he ran around in sandals and a diaper.

Some of the family.

Cousins.

I just love this sweet photo of Amy & Nana.

Bubba rocking the diaper and sandals look.

The second day of the reunion we went to the splash pad (the same one I took Russell to when he was about a year older than Bubba). Bubba enjoyed bouncing on the trampoline, opening and closing a gate, and taking his blankie in the water.

So tired.

Throwback of Russell at the fish.

That evening we met at my aunt and uncle's house for tacos. I was tasked with picking up Nana along with one of my cousins. We got Nana to my aunt and uncle's house and my cousin helped her out of the car. As I was parking the car on the side of the road (we have a big family and there were a lot cars) a fancy sports car pulled up along side me and rolled down their windows, there were two guys in the car who looked to not be much older than me. They wanted to know "what kind of party we were having." I told them it was a family reunion. They didn't seem convinced. I proceeded to say, this is my grandma's car, I just dropped her off. The told me I should go do burnouts with it, I declined. They asked if I had ever been in trouble before and I told them no. They still didn't believe me. Finally I said, "I'm a Mormon and I have a baby in the backseat." That made them chuckle and they drove off. It was such an awkward situation, but I am glad they left. About that same time one of my cousins came out to check on me. I am so glad that Bubba and I were kept safe.

We very much enjoyed eating tacos and visiting with family. Bubba even had his first taste of ice cream, he loved it! Must be his Daddy's boy. My Dad and uncles made rockets out of cardboard and paper and launched them off, the kids played lawn games and we took family photos-- it made for a great evening!

Visiting with Nana.

Building rockets.

As I was talking with one of my aunt's about life and the trials I have experienced she seemed impressed by the things I had learned, she could relate to some of the things I have gone through. She told me to "remember that (I) am important." I was so touched by her comments, it was something I think I definitely needed to hear that night.

The last day of the reunion the family did a photo scavenger hunt, Bubba and I sat that one out. We joined in the festivities later in the day though with a barbecue and pool party at my cousin's house. Bubba wasn't interested in the swimming pool, he wanted to play in all of the fountains and ponds, I was continually chasing him down. I am grateful to my cousin's who helped me keep tabs on him and chase him down, this pregnant mama was worn out! I tied a bunch of balloon animals for the kids, they loved it!

The next day Bubba and I were scheduled to fly out. My Dad picked us up and took us to their hotel so we could say goodbye to my sister and her husband (they were all staying at the same hotel), they stopped at the reunion for one day to say hi and bye to everyone as they drive across the country(they are moving to Connecticut). As they pulled out of the hotel parking lot and drove away tears streamed down my face, I am not much of a crier but I hate goodbyes. I am not sure when I will see my sister again but wish them the best in this new adventure.

Julie became really ill the night before and my Dad ended up taking her to the Emergency Room to get an I.V., we hope she gets feeling better soon! Being sick is never fun!

My uncle was kind enough to run Bubba and I to the airport. As I was talking with my uncle about a trial I am currently going through, he reassured me that I am doing the right things.

It was so good to spend time with my family and I am grateful to have Noack blood in my veins. I know that my family is far from perfect (no family is perfect) but we are a family of strength, we love each other deeply and we are always there for one another. We make the most of difficult situations and trust that the Lord will help us through and I love that about my family.

On flight from Spokane to Portland Bubba was super wiggly. Part way though our flight there was a medical emergency and the flight attendants asked for any doctors or nurses on the flight to come help-- they didn't tell us what was going on. You could feel the stress and tension in the air. The plane seemed to pick up speed. We encountered some pretty intense turbulence and made a fast and hard landing (we landed early). We were met on the ground by ambulances and firetrucks. The paramedics hauled and gentleman off supposedly he was having trouble breathing.

I looked at my boarding pass to double check what time our next flight would be boarding and decided to use the bathroom and order a late lunch. As Bubba and I were stuffing our faces I heard someone say "This is the final call for passengers so and so, so and so and me." Not sure how I misread by boarding pass or how I didn't hear the first boarding call, the terminal we were sitting in wasn't very big. I scooped by Bubba and shoved our box of food into the stroller a kind stranger sitting next to me offered to push the stroller to the gate for me and we all booked it to the gate. They closed the gate right behind me, I am so glad we made our connecting flight. Bubba passed out in my lap just before we landed and some kind strangers helped me gather all of our stuff up off the plane. Andy met us out front and helped us get all of our bags, it was so good to see him! It was nice to spend time with my family, but it was also nice to be home.